How did we get here ?
"Whatever happened in the past is over. Do not dwell on past mistakes. There's no point in crying over spilt milk. Everybody makes mistakes. It's what you learn from your mistakes and promising yourself not to repeat the mistakes that matters. " Words spoken from my mentors throughout my life.
I grew up the BlackSheep in every environment I was apart of. And, I mean BlackSheep in the most negative connotation. I’m not sure if my size, stature, color, voice, the way I saw myself or if my temperament had anything to do with peoples expectations and treatment of me. Maybe it was the environment I grew up in. Which was a very unsafe and violent place, violent in the sense of physically, mentally and emotionally. I felt lost, confused, heavy, misunderstood, taken advantage of, treated differently and targeted. Have you ever felt like you were in a constant war? In that war you were never safe, which meant you had to wear armor to protect your self from being harmed during the attacks. That was me, I always felt attacked.
People would mistake my armor of protection for armor of war. My reality was that I was, and I am, a builder, protector and fixer for those around me, especially those who were, unsure, hurt, afraid, voiceless, invisible, blind, weaker or smaller.
The epiphany I recently had was, I felt like I didn’t have a place where I could take my armor off. I just wanted a place where I could relax. In a safe place that was war free. Not having a safe space created some real issues for me. In my mind I just wanted to be free of war and violence. But, I also didn’t want anyone else to experience my challenges.
Are you a builder, protector and fixer?
I wasn’t a lead the pack kind of guy. I never wanted to be the captain. Or the president. Due to the kind of attacks that I experienced as a black sheep. They told me and showed me, the nail that sticks out gets hammered. I never wanted attention, but attention always demanded me. Being a black sheep wasn’t a conscious choice or even a desire. I found out that the blessing of being a black sheep can go either way. My choices were between things being positive or negative. So I made a decision, if attention was going to demand me, I was going to make sure that, what I was doing was worth paying attention to. I went with the positivity.
I guess the movie, “Divergent” was right. “Great Leaders Don't Seek Power. They're Called By Necessity”. Even though my environment showed a lack of hope and progression, I would not stop. Just like you, I wanted to be great and do great things, I just didn't know how to be great and do great things, but, I did learn to stand on my story and not live in it.
Being able to stand on my story and grow through all the battles, wars, lions, tigers and bears I experienced, led others to pay attention to me as a beautiful BlackSheep and not the negative black sheep the world saw me as. My understanding now, is that, Black sheep are beautiful and they were never meant to fit in. They were called to excellence, honor and mastery. I was called by necessity to become a leader and a guide for those who inspire and advocate for my community and beyond. So that we can all become great and stand on our stories too. With that call from necessity, I now take full responsibility to assist those who are looking to take the next step in their life's journey.
If you or someone you know is looking to be great, learn the rules and regulations of the game of life, or if they are just a black sheep in their environment like I was, then 4YourEpiphany was built just for you. And for them too. Come with us and learn to stand on your own story, and find where your greatness exists. We will help you attach to the principles of success, so you can do great things and become the best version of yourself!